* If you’re a fan of Ms James, please don’t read any further as I don’t wish to offend anyone. *
Anastasia is a 21 year old virgin who is finishing up her senior year in college, at the end of which she hopes to get a job at a publishing house. As a favor to her best friend she takes over her assignment of interviewing 27 year old wealthy entrepreneur, Christian Grey. Despite a rather strange and uncomfortable meeting, the two develop an attraction for each other. The problem is for Ana, there is a lot more to the enigmatic Christian than meets the eye and their relationship does not progress smoothly. The question is: can these two make the compromises that are necessary to make this relationship work?
I first reviewed Fifty Shades of Grey for the blog of the library where I worked, when it was first published in 2012. After that, I intended to banish it from my mind, and pretend I never heard of it. So why, you may be asking, am I revisiting it now? Well, with the movie coming out for Valentine’s Day, I recently forced myself to re-read it thinking that maybe I was wrong. Perhaps I was just in the wrong mood when I read it three years ago and was overly harsh. I’m sorry to say, it did nothing to change my mind. No, I’m sticking with my assessment that this is one of the most poorly written, over-hyped books I’ve ever had the misfortune to read. It has nothing to do BDSM or Erotica, as I’ve read other books with these themes and have enjoyed them. My dislike is aimed at the juvenile repetitive writing and overwhelmingly grating characters. For anyone who isn’t familiar with the story behind the trilogy, this originally began as “Twilight” fan fiction. I don’t really get this as it doesn’t remotely resemble Stephenie Meyers books, unless you count that the characters are even more annoying than Bella and Edward. The only positive thing I can say about the book is that it has a lovely cover, and it does move fairly quickly. The latter is due mainly to the fact that about halfway through the book much of it turns into a series of emails between Ana and Christian, thus taking up much of the pages. The plot is boring and predictable, and you can see the “cliffhanger”ending coming a mile a way. The characters are equally dreadful. Ana is incredibly immature, even for her young age. She could give lessons in moaning, whining, vacillating, and being self-centered to Bella, and that’s really saying something. Christian is an emotionally bereft narcissist, and despite his wealth and good looks had me astonished that anyone would be attracted to him. He also has this whole creepy stalker vibe going on. His description as the so-called “Dominant” just isn’t believable. We’re supposed to buy into the fact that he has this incredibly strong, magnetic, and domineering personality, yet he’s completely undone by fairly mundane things like Ana wearing his underwear. Seriously? For a book being billed as erotica, there just isn’t much passion going on between these two. I actually found myself yawning through some of the supposedly steamier scenes. What really drove me crazy though is Ms James’ rather limited and repetitive vocabulary. Words and phrases I NEVER want to hear again:
· “Holy” anything
· “Oh My”
· “Jeez”
· “Laters Baby”
· “Inner Goddess”
· “My subconscious”
There are probably others that I’ve blocked out. At the rate Ana kept referring to the last two on the list, I was becoming convinced that she was suffering from Multiple Personality Disorder! These words/phrases appeared on practically every single page! What happened to the editor for this book? I honestly cannot think of anyone I could recommend this to. Who knows. Maybe the movie will be better. In the meantime, for anyone who is new to this genre, Fifty Shades of Grey is not the end all and be all of erotic literature. There are so many better authors out there such as: Emma Holly, Sylvia Day, Shayla Black, and Sophie Morgan, just to name a few. Embrace your inner goddess and try some of these!
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thebookishuniverse said:
I completely agree with everything you say!
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alexinbookland said:
Yep, your review is exactly the same as mine!
Also it promotes DV and is nothing like true/real BDSM.
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
You’re right Alex! How ironic that they’ve chosen to release the movie for Valentine’s Day.
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alexinbookland said:
I think it was to manipulate people into thinking it is a romance -_-
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lowcountrybooklover said:
If my husband said Laters Baby to me I would probably throat punch him. 🙂
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
Yep! I think I’d deck mine!
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
Good point Alex. The book was certainly manipulative so why not the movie?
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Sue, the YA Author said:
I refuse to get sucked into this book! Ick! The concept of dominance seems so barbaric. Thanks for writing an honest post!
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
Thanks Sue.
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nairnmcintyre said:
Nice review Kim.
I hate it when books basically rely on one thing i.e sex, and completely forget the importance of the writing process.
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
Thanks Nairn. What really gets to me is that there are so many better authors out there who write erotica.
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Christine said:
I agree with everything you’ve said. I speed read the trilogy a few years ago. I think they are so bad, they are hilarious.
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
Thanks Christine. Wow! You made it through all three? You are a brave soul!!!
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Christine said:
Haha! I know. Crazy of me. I spent most of the books wanting to thump Christian
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
So I take it you’re not going to see the movie?
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Christine said:
Think I will give that one a miss. I’d much rather see a thriller with a high body count and plenty of action 🙂
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
Hear! Hear!
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emmakwall said:
Fantastic review Miss Kim, VERY true and absolutely hilarious. I was giggling at the disclaimer and then as I kept reading – giggling even more!
“Laters baby” – URGH!!!!!! I really noticed the repetition of phrases as well. They were awful books! Twilight must surely be better??
It’s nice you did pick some positives out too, the book cover and the fast moving story. They’re easy reads as well. I will say that for them! Maybe 1 or 2 brain cells required?
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
Thanks Ems! I actually liked Twilight and the sequel, but then they went downhill very quickly for me 😦 As for 50 Shades? It kills me that Ms James has become filthy rich over such complete rubbish. Ah well. C’est La Vie!
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elmediat said:
What is really sad is how the movie glamorizes and promotes an abusive relationship. I shudder to think how many vulnerable young women/girls will use this for a template for romance & commitment.
No matter what Hollywood & the publishers say, All Mass Media contains values, beliefs & ideologies and they all convey intended & unintended messages.
Waiting for 50 Shades of Barbie, as they try to widen their demographic & their profits.
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
I absolutely agree!
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Heena Rathore P. said:
Brilliant review Kim! I’m planning on reading this one soon… lol…. I know, everyone has lashed out on this book and I want to read it so that I can finally have a book with less than 3 stars for my review… It would give me an opportunity to finally criticize a book!
Anyways, have you checked out my new blog, Heena Rathore P. (http://heenarathorep.com/) Just wanted to confirm as a lot of my friends are not yet aware about it!
Have a great day dear!
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
Thanks Heena! I have checked it out and I’m following! I’d like to be a reviewer, but I can’t manage it right now. Maybe sometime in the future? Anyway, it’s a great blog 🙂
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Heena Rathore P. said:
I mean “aware of” (silly grammatical mistakes! lol!)
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TimeDancer said:
This post alone made me click the follow button with lightning speed! You are one of the few people I have seen who agree with me about this whole 50 shades nonsense. I read thirty pages of that book, put it down, and then never ever picked it up again. Yuck!!!!
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
For me this book is truly the worst book I’ve ever read, and I’ve read some absolute drivel!
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vinnieh said:
Great review Kim, I have no intention whatsoever to read this rubbish.
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
I’ve read some badly written books, but this one surpasses any of the other Vinnie. It kills me that she’s gotten so rich off of such trash!😡
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vinnieh said:
I don’t mind tasteful erotica but this looks like filth.
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
You know what Vinnie? It was just stupid. The so-called erotic scenes weren’t believable, the two main characters were unlikable, and the whole thing was just badly written. It kills me that she’s got legions of fans because there is so much better written erotica out there.
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vinnieh said:
I bet there is much better erotica out there. Any particular ones you like?
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
The authors I listed are all really good. I especially like Emma Holly.
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vinnieh said:
Thanks for the suggestions Kim.
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
😊😊🙋🏻🙋🏻
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vinnieh said:
A friend dared me not so long ago to watch the movie. I seriously want those two hours of my life back. The film was boring, ridiculous and nothing close to sexy.
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
Worst drivel EVER!
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vinnieh said:
So you had the displeasure of seeing this film too?
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
Oh God no! Reading the first book was torture enough!
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vinnieh said:
The film was just abysmal. No chemistry or intrigue at all. Everyone saying how much sex there was in it was clearly watching another film.
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vinnieh said:
You were spared a terrible film. And to think that people went to see it for Valentine’s Day. It’s a swindle.
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
😡
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vinnieh said:
He’s that’s how I felt after watching it.
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vinnieh said:
Did you ever read Secret Diary of a Call Girl?
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
No I haven’t. I’ll have to look it up.
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vinnieh said:
I think there’s a few books. They are the true memoirs of a London call girl known as Belle De Jour. For years everyone wondered who this woman with the pseudonym was, until she herself revealed that she was now a scientist.
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
Sounds interesting. I’ll definitely check them out.
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vinnieh said:
There was a television series too.
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
Hmm. Haven’t heard of that either.
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vinnieh said:
It’s a raunchy series starring Billie Piper.
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
Ooh! I love Billie Piper. I Unfortunately no one in my library system has the tv series on dvd. The books are available though so when I have time I’ll check those out. Thanks for telling me about them Vinnie.
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vinnieh said:
She’s a great actress and really gorgeous. Check the books, you may think of reviewing them.
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
I loved her in Mansfield Park and Penny Dreadful.
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vinnieh said:
Thanks for reminding me that i have to catch more of Penny Dreadful. And I wanted to ask, I know you said that the Q&A I did wasn’t really your thing, but could you ask me another question? I trust you to come up with a good one.
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
Oh. Um, okay. It probably won’t be today cause I’ve got another migraine and I pretty much wiped myself out posting a new book review, but I’ll see if I can come up with another. You didn’t like the one I asked?
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vinnieh said:
Sorry to hear about the migraines Kim, you take your time and feel better. Quite the contrary, your last question was great. I just know I can have a good conversation with you as you’re wonderful.
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
Thanks Vinnie. I’m going to take a break from my tablet right now. If you have a chance, I’d love to hear your thoughts on the review I wrote.
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vinnieh said:
I will bookmark it and leave a nice comment Kim. You go and rest, get ride of that pesky migraine and relax sister.
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
Ow.😢
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vinnieh said:
You’re simply amazing, never forget that.
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
😗
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vinnieh said:
I can’t ask for a better blogging friend than you.
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
I feel the same about you Vinnie.😊
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vinnieh said:
You’re a doll!
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vinnieh said:
I haven’t offended you have I? If so, I’m very sorry.
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
No offense. I just don’t talk about sex much believe it or not.
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vinnieh said:
I totally understand. Forget about me asking that question. You just take a break. Even though you don’t talk about sex much, you still like my site? I can tone it down.
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
Don’t you dare tone it down because of me! I do enjoy the blog and the passion you put into it.
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vinnieh said:
Message received. Hope you’re feeling better soon. Rest up now.
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Shalini said:
I want to embrace my inner goddess too oh my!! My subconscious is asking for it. Hahahhaa this was a masterpiece. Absolute brilliant. I loved it
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
Hahaha!😂 I’m so glad you liked the review Shalini.🤗
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Shalini said:
I loved it and shared on Twitter 🤣🤣
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
Oh God. Hopefully I won’t get flamed by E.L. James fans!😏
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Shalini said:
Huhh? Are there fans of crap?
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By Hook Or By Book ~ Book Reviews, News, & Other Stuff said:
Sadly yes.🤷🏻♀️
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